I see my husband all day, everyday. Literally.
Besides marrying young (when Daniel proposed I was 22), we got married at 23, we also share a very unorthodox married life because as husband and wife AND business partners, we see each other 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
Every waking moment, we spend together and…I think alot of you will hear the siren bells ringing in your head and be like..OH MY GOD. What a bad idea.
But so far it's been…3 months and I have to say, we're doing much better than I initially thought we would be.
I mean, it sounds like a huge pain to have your SO around all the time right? But ehhhhhh it wasn't so bad for us!
We used to already spend a lot of time together when we were dating so I guess getting married just allowed us to spend even MORE time together and we jumped at the opportunity 😂
What a typical day is like for us
We work late, sometimes super duper late because in the day we do alot of logistical work and at night, we do admin.
He does alot of the logistics stuff and workflow in the packing room/stock room and I do alot of strategizing for the marketing and advertising aspects.
This can set our bedtime back to 4am sometimes and we pretty much work at our own pace and our own space for 5-6 hours depending on how busy we get.
This means…we don't wake up very early 😂 Typically we wake up around 9-10 but on busy days, 7-8. This is also usually when we start our day.
For me, it's a huge cup of coffee from the coffee sock. And for Daniel…water? We have very different morning routines and for most of the part, we don't talk to eat other until we are having breakfast downstairs.
Of course we say good morning and share a morning kiss la. I used to get damn angry when Daniel is grumpy in the morning. 😂
I think starting your day on a good note is the best. It's better than a strong cup of coffee and definitely way better than a nice brunch 😂
If you've quarrelled the night before, it's a good time to resolve it in the morning and not let it bleed into the rest of your day.
After our good mornings, I do my own morning routine and head downstairs to have breakfast/do my own thing.
Daniel usually only comes down at lunch time hehe.
After lunch is where work begins. Daniel works in the packing room with @boshifang and @chenshiqi and I sometimes find a little corner to do my work/reply emails.
We occasionally talk, but generally leave each other alone 😂 I've come to realise that if we are left to work together in a messy environment (i.e the packing room) we get miffed at each other super easily.
So while I used to do work in the packing room, I moved out so there's less friction.
But I still pop into the room when their laughter or shouting gets too loud. Cos I #fomo 😂😂😂😂
After work, we (uh more specifically Daniel and shiqi) either go to the gym or we head out/stay home for dinner. Then hang for awhile more before everyone goes home.
THAT'S WHEN THE FUN BEGINS.
Cos after work we get to do our own shit 😂😂 I usually take this time to scroll through social media and Daniel plays his games.
Recently, he's bloody obsessed with tsumtsum and he can play it until 2am at night. 😂😂
And sometimes when we feel like it, we head out after dinner to gai gai 😂
Uh but it is mostly motivated by being hungry and wanting food. Tonight it is for nine fresh. I find it super affordable at only $2???
Ok but I digress HAHA. I am in no position to give marriage advice considering how we've only been married 10 months. But I think we're doing pretty well for a couple that sees each other so much.
At least I don't feel like killing him yet 😂
It's all about giving in
I used to be super duper stubborn and I never give in when it comes to arguments. Especially when I know I'm right.
You can ask my friends la. If you argue with me, I'll never back down. It also applies to me being a customer cos if you give me bad service and you deny it, I'll give you hell. There was once in Hong Kong, I stood in the hotel lobby for about 1 hour arguing with the front desk because they refused to give us a room we had paid for…and wanted to short-change us.
But I guess one thing you gotta learn in love and relationships is that there's really no wrong or right la. Especially when it comes down to arguments.
Like just a few minutes ago, Daniel was frustrated by something and talked to me in a shit tone even tho it wasn't my fault. I obviously was super pissed off. He quickly apologised after that but I was still boiling inside.
Then I asked myself. He already apologised and when he does he is sincere. What more do I want?
If I continue to black face because I think I'm right, then the argument will continue for God knows how long. And it will go like this..
D: I already apologised what what you want!!
C: Apologise then win already ah??? Next time I shout at you then I apologise also ok??
D: Ya ok la. You want to shout at me you shout la! Not like you never shout at me.
Which is so ridiculous right. Like lol what's the point.
So…end your arguments quickly and don't let it drag. Even if it involves cutting short the time you get to be angry at him or to let go of the upper hand.
I hate going to sleep with unresolved arguments cos I wake up feeling like shit and I let it ruin a possibly beautiful day.
Use your mouth and communicate
If you're buaysong with him, just tell him. In the face HAHAHA.
Lucky for myself, I cannot keep stuff inside if I feel like something is wrong. Plus, I have like the most obvious "I'm bothered by something face" so Daniel (and Boshi and shiqi) know when I'm troubled by something.
But please try to do it privately and not in front of everyone. We all have egos and the last thing we wanna do is have it bruised in front of others.
My preferred method of doing it is through text because I feel like when it comes out of your mouth you don't think it through as much as if you had to write it out.
Plus, it gives the recipient time to read and think through instead of ftf where they feel pressurized to come up with a response quickly.
I feel that when Daniel and I argue ftf we are affected by body language and always feel a need to make snarky remarks. But usually via text, we read and calm down and accept quicker.
But yeah. If you're not happy with something, say it out! If not for the entire day you are seeing each other you'll just get more irritated by the moment and you'll explode eventually.
Which….is not a good look 😂 so don't keep things to yourself la!! 😎
Give each other space…? 🤔
This one…I am also working on it HAHAHA. Whenever Daniel wants to go out with his friends I will default give a whiney face HAHAHAHA.
But he still goes ok! I'm not a tiger wife 😂 We also hang out alot with our friends (although mostly together cos we have so many common friends).
But sometimes it's not about just going out with others. It's also being able to be independent together.
Like being in the same space but not needing to do everything together.
Like for example now, I'm Dayre-ing and Daniel is idk doing what. 😂 Wait let me go find out.
He's trawling through forums to find out how he can play tsum tsum better.
HAHAHA. Oh and btw try to be supportive of each other's habits even if they are annoying or bad but not harmful ones.
I think that's about it. Oh and of course, be very transparent la. Like the thing about being so close is that there is literally no room for secrets.
HAHA my telegram is virtually open on every laptop unit in the office so this kinda only works if you guys have nothing to hide. Means no more planning surprises 😂
If you guys have any questions can just ask ok. My post nine fresh brain is not very active now and lying in bed is not helping. 😂
I think I might post about what it's like to stay with parents after marriage + how to choose a side to stay with (treading into dangerous waters). Been wanting to share what it's like for us staying with my mum but haven't gotten to arranging my thoughts. #dayrewives 😂